sexta-feira, setembro 15, 2017

The Ballet Dancer: "The Late Show" by Michael Connelly


“It’s like the laws of physics—for every action, there is an opposite and equal reaction. If you go into darkness, the darkness goes into you. You then have to decide what to do with it. How to keep yourself safe from it. How to keep it from hollowing you out.”

In "The Late Show" by Michael Connelly


It isn't polite to look in through other people’s windows. I knew this but still I would do it. It isn't an obsession, it isn't voyeuristic. No. But sometimes things would catch my eye as I walked past. A nice vase, a sleeping cat, a glimpse of a print on a wall, random "stuff" that makes a home a home. I liked to imagine who would surround themselves with these things, what do they look like? How do they live? In one window, I know is a tiny figurine of a young ballet dancer - cheap, pastel, glazed. Nondescript. Given a place of prominence through love.
I once saw the woman who owned that dancer.
It was her feet, the size of her feet. Sitting on the bus, I was just mesmerized by her feet. Spilling over her cheap plastic slip-on shoes. Feet that looked bulbous and par boiled like a body rising from a too hot bath. Veins cracking and breaking under the strain of their burden. Sad, shuffling feet trudging homeward, kicking carrier bags straining under the weight of their contents.
I followed the feet really, not the woman. I honestly don't recall what she looked like. Large I suppose, judging by her feet. Those feet. And, as I passed the door she had disappeared through, I took a glance to the side - there was this little dancer. More delicate in that moment than anything I had seen before.

I walked on and away. I have never been back to that street, but sometimes I think about that figurine and wonder if those feet might dream of dancing. I try not to look in windows any more.

4 comentários:

Book Stooge disse...

just as an fyi, the link in your wordpress post just links back to your wordpress, not to your blogspot post.


I have a feeling that this post reveals much more than you intended. It is obvious, to a trained mind like mine, that you have some deep seated psychological issues. Dr. Bookstooge shall psychoanalyze you, FOR FREE!

Looking into others' windows. This shows the deep, twisted need to mingle silently and unobtrusively with others. It could turn into a character flaw of power seeking in later years.

Noting the ballet figurine. This shows that you want to dress up in little pretty princess clothes and go prancing around town. Veeeeeeeery interesting!

Big feet. You objectivize people. This was the most disturbing thing to read. I suspect it will take YEARS and many, many [paid] sessions to help you get over this deep seated hang up. I will setup monday evenings for future sessions and you can just give me your bank account number for auto-paying. Make at least one part of this process easy!

Poor Manuel, my heart breaks for you and I'm glad you made this cry for help. We're here for you.

Manuel Antão disse...

Oh alright then.

It was a holiday in Lisbon in 1979. I had a Superman lolly which was a Coca Cola flavoured lolly that came on a white plastic stick with a figure of a superhero on top. I did not get the Flash. I was never the same since then. Maybe I should let it all out, what really happened with that ice cream...

On top of that, my smartphone apparently is also telling everyone exactly who I am right now. There's only chance: Settings | Apps | Uninstall. No more endorphin rush from a 'like' or a 'follow'; it is addictive and is turning people into androids, detached from reality, fostering and nurturing the online version of themselves, the construct.

Thanks for being there for me Bookstooge.

Book Stooge disse...

Ahhh, THAT explains a lot. A superman lollipop. Obviously you thought his cape was a skirt and you have deep displaced feelings ever since. I'm sensing some really long [paid] sessions. I hope you can afford me.

But since we're such good buddies, I'll cut you a deal. Your second born, no questions asked. See, I'm not the kind of guy who asks for your firstborn :-)

I'm so ahead of you in that app thing. Never installed the wordpress app. Nobody knows who I am,not even the government, hahahahaaha.

Thanks for playing these ridiculous word games with me. Almost nobody else will, for some reason...

Manuel Antão disse...

No one can afford you Bookstooge.